Far Cry Instincts: Predator – Review

The name’s Carver, Jack Carver! Carver is back, or is he? It’s difficult to say, because as soon as I put this game into the 360 I developed a nervous twitch and a voice appeared in the back of my mind saying: “Didn’t you buy this exact game on the original Xbox just last year?” Far Cry Instincts: Predator is essentially the Far Cry Instincts that saw light of day in 2005, but it’s been brought into 2006 with a splash of next-generation polish and some high-definition 360 glitz—but that’s pretty much it.

Tell me a tale.
The story in Far Cry Instincts: Predator sees the hero, Mr. Jack Carver—ex-military monkey—injected with who knows what to give him evolved feral abilities in an attempt to transform him into a ‘super soldier’. The story starts out with Jack relaxing on his boat enjoying some sun after his jet-ski is borrowed by the rather nice Val Cortez—who’s paid Carver to hire his vessel for a ‘tour’ of the local tropical islands. He abruptly awakens amid the sound of helicopter blades and bursts of gunfire that rip into his boat. Luckily he’s anchored near the island Ms. Cortez went to explore, so into the gorgeous and glimmering Xbox 360 water he dives and swims in the direction of the lush tropical island. Once there, Carver has to deal with some of the dumbest—yes, people, DUMBEST—mercenaries ever to have walked the face of any videogame; these guys make George W. Bush look like a MENSA applicant who flew through the process.

The original Far Cry brought something new to the FPS genre in that it allowed players to set jungle traps for foes to unwittingly walk into, and to also distract enemies by throwing rocks or whatever might be to hand. But, let’s face it, with enemies as dim as this, who truly cares about using those facets of the gameplay? The only parts of Instincts: Predator that I actually thought qualified as ‘fun’—though not with a capital ‘F’—were the driving sections, or the opportunities that arose to use heavy weaponry to mow down those dumb-ass enemy mercenaries. Even the feral thrills were short lived, I’m afraid. Yes, the ability to sprint at inhuman speeds and leap great distances is certainly fun the first few times, as is the vicious feral attack, but, as was already mentioned, we’ve done all this a year ago. It was good then, and while it’s certainly better looking now, it’s SO annoying to find it all wrapped around the same game.

Multiplayer hell!
The single-player offers nothing more than polished graphics, so I even tried Xbox Live to boost Instincts: Predator’s appeal—all for the sake of this review as it’s a gaming experience I personally despise. It grieves me to say it but the game never picked up for me here either, I found it an unpleasant social interaction that was made all the worse by instances of definite lag. Admittedly, one of the multiplayer game modes was quite fun; in which you attempt to stop a player with feral instincts, but even that tiny flare of positivity just doesn’t forgive the lag-addled Live experience that was apparent during at least half of the games played.

Music to my pointy ears.
The sound in Far Cry Instincts: Predator actually emerges as one of its high points. The voice acting is decent enough, with Carver brought to life convincingly by actor Stephen Dorff, and the exterior sound effects are also extremely nicely orchestrated. Hard of hearing gamers can play the game with absolutely no problems as, let’s face it, it is just another shoot-shoot-boom-boom first-person shooter.

Growl, I’m a bad man!
Yes, honey, of course you are, even though women are in the forces too, chances are you would be a man and chances are there’s no parallel story with a female hero who growls and kicks ass like Catwoman. Of course, there is Val, who does everything in her power to be cool, but is still essentially another peripheral female character that plays second fiddle to the macho male hero. When ‘Jaclyn’ Carver becomes hero of the Far Cry universe, give me a call.

What’s the skinny?
The skinny, my fellow gamers, is this: a static average score. And why? Well, I personally find it lame beyond comprehension to a see a game released under the guise of supposed newness when what consumers are essentially paying for is an old game with a graphics makeover. While there is a forgettable ‘new’ section to be played, it’s scandalous to market something as new when it plainly isn’t. If, and I mean IF, this were a new game it would have scored more highly, as obviously it wouldn’t be a mere rehash. However, as it is, the pretty graphics do not forgive what I personally see as an affront to gamers everywhere: an old game given a slap of makeup, a new hairdo and booted towards the unsuspecting public. It would be shallow of me to suggest anything other than you don’t purchase Far Cry Instincts: Predator, and instead give it a rental if you’re curious or have never played a Far Cry game. Of course, should you be one of those people who would rather date a dimwitted, shallow, model, you’re going to love this title because the metaphor is much the same. For me, however, gloss alone will always be a lesser god to intelligence, wit, and wonder—all of which last forever.

Review by Eden